Regarding “Jon and Kate”…
On a scale of 1 to 10, how interested are you on this subject?
1 being “don’t give a shit” and
10 being “couldn’t care less”
25
Jun
09
5 year olds
04
May
09
Reality bites back
PLEASE REPEAT WITH ME THIS MODERN AMERICAN PLEDGE:
We Americans, do solemnly swear to hang on every comment from the Idol judges, to disregard living our own lives by indulging in mind-numbing reality television, promise to purchase 75% of goods or services that our reduced brain mass can recall the ad jingle to, and to base actions solely on situational comedy/drama from the latest episode of _____________ (insert favorite program here).
And when our children turn ___ (age “it all went wrong”), you naively wonder, “why”?
01
May
09
TGIF
It’s Friday! So in celebration of the weekend (and the fact that I may be a tad bit lazy), I have opted to post my comprehensive list of pick up lines that 98% of women say actually work. (see note at bottom of page).
The survey was conducted on 10 major college campuses, the grocery store around the corner from my apartment, some seedy bars, in my cousins bathroom at her dorm, and pretty much anywhere else I have been bold enough, or drunk enough, to attempt to hit on women.
THE LIST:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
*The remaining mythical 2% of women who actually buy into sloppy, drunk frat boys or middle aged douche bags who somehow fuck up lines like “you’re an angel whose feet are tired?” are made up of sorority sisters who have lost a dare/bet, girls who like jager bombs, women who like to “just, like chill, maybe get blazed and dance to the Pussycat Dolls. Whatevs, I’m down!”, or a handful of my ex-girlfriends.
30
Apr
09
Western Youth
note: Numerous quotes were used on this page instead of pretty, pretty pictures for you “dull leftists who probably can’t read or probably even see this page, cause, you know, you can’t use a computer, cause you are too busy being a socialist to grow up and get a REAL job like my daddy gave me.”
A new college student organization that emerged in the name of hate tactics and radical thoughts met over coffee at the local Starbucks of their choice on Monday morning. The reason? To discuss which chapter would set the agenda for the Friday night LYNCH MOB DANCE!!! This group has identified themselves as Youth for Western Civilization whose mission and goal is “America’s right wing youth movement focused on countering radical multiculturalism, socialism and mass immigration.” (Oh, and also to make fun of emails wear peephole type stuff wrng.)
Sounds similar to the Young Republicans to this blogger, but then again, I am a “trendy multicultural thinker” and these are well educated college students. Speaking of, this conservative political group is currently organized on at least seven university campuses! That’s almost as many as GLASP (Gay and Lesbians Against Sean Penn), who have claimed 3 more campuses this week alone! OMG! see “MILK”
The group hopes to inspire Western youth on the “basis of pride in their American and Western heritage,” (just like the KKK!), counter and ultimately defeat “leftism on campus” and create a social movement in which a right-wing subculture is a “healthy” alternative to what it calls a “poisonous and bigoted” campus climate.
Well, I for one am happy as a pig with the flu to learn that our public schools have educated these bright young minds to close tight, and without warning I might add, and blindly follow exactly what spews from FOX news, the internet, and their parents!
I am sure that I will have more to say soon on these matters, as I would assume they keep a close eye on what is written about them and will probably bitch about this for, “like a whoooole week.”
external links for:
29
Apr
09
PANDEMIC
With the outbreak of swine flu I think it’s high time to address the long understated pandemic of Pig AIDS.
Public Service Announcement from Dr. WHO: “In the midst of the current crisis of Pig AIDS, we must remember to remain informed, aware, and of course, scared shitless. Avoid breakfast meats, Wilbur, and “fuckin da police” especially straight from the underground.”
